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I guess Im weird. I love being in a relationship, I love having someone to treat like a queen, but I suck at them. I despise being alone but get told I push people away. I give everyone unbridled honesty, yet Im the bad guy for being "mean". Ive had my heart broken more than Id like to admit. I went and became friends with God and my life honestly makes Less sense now. I want love and affection but I think somewhere in my subconscious I fear it this isnt even me really asking for anything.I do want love and a woman and to settle down One day. But my wants seems contradictory to my actions I guess im weird.
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Apeshit has a good point. Here's how it logiy works out: By your husband knowing and willing letting you explore a relationship with a woman he either 1. Is confident enough in your relationship that he is not threatened, 2. Does not care if you fall in with a woman and might potentially leave him, or 3. Is willing to accept the fact that you could fall in and he is willing to share your. #1 implies that he and/or you view the person you would sleep with solely as a sexual without the potential for a deeper relationship. This could discredit the value of the woman you sleep with, unless you both go in eyes open about the fact that it is just hook-up sex, and is equally usary in nature. #2 and #3 are clear in their meaning. Remember: be honest it's good you were honest with your husband, now be honest with yourself about what you want, and then be honest with the person you are going to try and hook up with. There are women out there that would hook up with a married woman, in fact there are plenty of other married women out there for you to choose from.
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